Coaching
the score has nothing to do with winning
by Creg
I was lucky enough, as a kid, to have a dad that loved to coach me in sports just as much as I loved playing in sports. As far back as I can remember, my dad either coached, or helped coach, baseball, soccer, and basketball. When my high school years rolled around, Dad switched from coaching to driving the team bus and keeping the book for all of my games. Of course, he was my biggest fan throughout all of my high school years. For most kids, competitive sports end after high school. For me, I was able to continue my sports career on a bit farther and play college soccer and baseball. Dad continued to cheer me on from the sidelines even though my college was in another state. I was lucky to have him as a dad and coach.
Every once in a while, I strap on my cleats, put on my catchers mask or goalie gloves, and dawn the field of play trying to relive my glory days as an athlete. This is all good, until the next day when my body reminds me that I am not 18 anymore. For the most part, I restrict myself to coaching and instructing baseball and soccer. When my daughter, Reed, was younger (1st grade) and still determining her athletic path, I was given the opportunity to coach her soccer team for 3 years. Have you ever watch primary school aged children play soccer? It is more a game of “herd ball” than soccer. Lillie, my youngest daughter, decided to play basketball with Reed as her first sport of choice. Once again, Dad (I) became coach. I was quickly reminded that these were young ladies, not the skilled players I played with in college.
It has been a few years since I have slid on my coaching hat. Both of my daughters moved on from my realm of athletics and found a deeper love for dance. They are both very talented dancers and are on a competition team. I could not be more proud of them. Last year, Andrew’s (my step son) baseball team, needed an assistant coach. With my background in baseball, I jumped at the chance to help. I had forgotten what little league was like. Until two years ago, I was still playing on a competitive baseball league with some current and many former college players. Little league baseball is hard! They require a lot of work! They don’t know who is supposed to be the cut off man when the hitter hits the ball to left field. Most don’t even know what a cut off man is. I didn’t realize that tying a shoe lace would be so much work or that the grass in center field was so interesting that my center fielder would feel the need to lie down and inspect it as the game was going on. As the season went on, I was able to see the kids improve, and more importantly, become more confident in themselves.
This year, a new head coach was taking on the task of leading Andrew’s team. He asked myself and another dad to assist. When the season started, our young team needed plenty of work. Skills were not top notch, but the kids were hungry and excited to be on the field. We started practices to work on hitting, fielding, catching, and supporting each other. We decided to not only make better players out of these young boys, but to instruct them to be better teammates and start becoming better men. We talked often about attitudes and paying attention to the details of the game. We talked about supporting and encouraging each other throughout the game. Myself and the other two coaches realize that to be successful in life there are a few things that men must have: 1. a great wife that loves, supports, cares, and prays for him, and 2. good, positive, male friends that support and care about him, as well. As this year has progressed, I have seen the boys become better skilled players (we took third in the end of the year tournament). They also began to rally behind each other. They recognized when a player was down on himself and needed encouragement. They started to talk, and not just about Minecraft or some pro-athlete, they became friends. Tonight was our last game of the year, we lost. We lost on paper, but our players, our boys, are starting to win at life. They were already talking about next year and what they look forward to in a new level of play. They were talking about what the rest of summer held for each of them and making plans to meet up to hang out.
Tonight, after our final game of the season. I’m taking the picture.
Andrew up to bat while I coach first base.
Being Stepdad can be hard. I love Andrew as my own, even if he’s not. Baseball has become one of our ways to bond. We love going to the batting cages where I can pitch to him and help him become a better hitter. He can work on his pitching skills by pitching to me while I catch. Most importantly, it is a place where he and I can talk. A place where we can step in the cage and both just be players in this thing called life. It gives us a chance to talk about his interests and what is bothering him. Once we step into the batting cage we are teammates that have to be there for each other. I have learned to love these little moments in time and cherish them before he grows up too much.
I’m starting to understand that it was not my athletic ability that dad loved to watch or that he loved coaching so much. He wanted time to listen to me,
and at the same time, teach me what it was to be a man.
pitching practice in the cages with Andrew
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